Reclaiming Your Identity Beyond the Past
Your past experiences shape you, but they don’t have to dictate who you are. Yet so often, we confuse what happened to us with who we are.
It’s like mistaking a scar for a wound. The scar tells a story, but it doesn’t mean you’re still bleeding. When you collapse your experiences into your identity, you begin to live inside outdated versions of yourself. And the cost is steep. You replay the same conflicts, fall into the same fears, and miss the new future waiting for you.
God’s Name Exchanges Were Full of Purpose
This isn’t new. All throughout Scripture, God rewrote people’s identities by changing their names. But He never did it randomly. Each name change carried a purpose for their future.
Abram meant “exalted father,” but God renamed him Abraham, “father of many nations.” His story expanded beyond his household to a legacy that would bless the world.
Jacob, “deceiver,” became Israel, “one who wrestles with God.” His identity shifted from schemer to covenant carrier.
Saul, meaning “desired,” became Paul, “small” or “humble.” The persecutor who once sought power was transformed into an apostle who carried strength through surrender.
Each exchange acknowledged their story but refused to let the past hold authority over their destiny.
Why Familiar Labels Keep You Stuck
When you adopt labels like not good enough, broken, too much, or unworthy, your nerve system wires them into your daily life and mental health. The amygdala reacts to the unknown with alarms. Cortisol surges. And instead of seeing possibilities, your Reticular Activating System filters for proof of failure.
That’s why you keep bumping into the same wall. Your brain is reinforcing the old story, even when your soul is crying out for a new one.
But here’s the hope: just as negative loops can be reinforced, so can positive ones. Every time you refuse to wear an old label, you begin building the neural pathways for freedom.
A Practice You Can Use Today
Try this:
Complete the sentence: “My story includes ______, but my identity is ______.”
Write it down. Say it out loud. Let your body feel the difference between carrying pain and carrying identity. Each repetition is not just words, it’s rewiring. Myelin wraps those new pathways into your brain, making them stronger with every choice.
You Are More Than What Happened
Your past is not your prison. It’s your preparation. Every scar carries wisdom and compassion, but it is not your name. You are not defined by your hardest chapter.
The world doesn’t need you to rehearse your wounds. It needs you to step into the truth of who you really are, the one God already renamed with purpose, freedom, and future.
Dr Barbara Eaton
Want to go deeper?
I write more about this in Two Streets Named Hard, especially Chapter 1, where I share, as a femal business coach, how easy it is to confuse a hard season with a hard identity. You’ll learn how to separate your story from your essence and begin living from freedom instead of wounds.
